Need to get it together or If I don't get organized my life will blow up

I need to get it together. ASAP.

I am usually overly organized in regards to my schedule, events, work, school etc. The only place I usually allow myself to be messy is at home and in my car. Lately though, I just can't seem to get it together. My calendar is out of whack, my apartment is extra messy and I have no routine.


The thing that is getting affected the most is my health. Not having a routine is forcing me to eat like crap and not work out. Let's just say I have put on about 10 pounds this summer. Ugh. So I am back on the wagon. I started yesterday. I ate decent meals and worked out. I think I may have pushed too much with the whole workout thing though. I ended up doing 30 min of weights, 30 min on the treadmill and then an hour Zumba class. Let's just say that I almost made myself sick. I need to remember to ease back into it. Otherwise I may pass out from exercise exhaustion. That would not be a pretty sight. lol.

My plan is get organized. Like super organized. And I plan on doing it this weekend. I am not joking when I mean organized. So much so that I will plan out every work out session, every to do, every homework night, etc so that I feel like I have some control. Wish me luck as I try to get it together this weekend.

Twentysomething rant

Many things have changed since I last updated this blog. Too many to recount now but I hope to bring things up to date soon.

Today I was inspired to write again because I feel that my life is oddly in flux. I don't generally like change. It makes me anxious and insecure. This makes life difficult for me as the world moves in change. I don't know where I got the notion that anything ever stays the same, even for a second. Those close to me know that I have grown to deal with change; even embrace it at times. Change can be good, bad or completely irrelevant. So I am just learning to live with it.

I have been struggling with my identity lately. Which is a very uncomfortable feeling. The older I get, the more I get to know myself, but the more I realize I don't know myself at all. I am almost 30, professionally employed, recently achieved my graduate degree and I have fulfilling relationships with people I love. So why do I keep feeling like I am 7 years old wondering "what am I going to be when I grow up?" or "What am I going to be like as a grown up?" Shouldn't I know these answers by now?

At my age my parents were married and had a child. When my parents were in their early 30's they seemed so secure in life. They seemed like adults. As I get closer to that age I get the feeling that maybe my life has come short. Maybe I don't know what I want to be when I grow up because part of me thinks I have failed. Shouldn't it have happened already? Being grown? But what does that even feel like? What does that even look like? Would I even like it?

Jaime Cullum was right. Being a twentysomething is a strange time.

Girl flirting - my attempt at friendliness

I am not the friendliest person, especially to new people. It is a miracle I can make friends at all...

It is so bad that the guy I am seeing, we shall call him Mr. M, often likes to tell the story of how we met. He reminds me that I he had to introduce himself to me even though I obviously looked like I didn't want to meet anyone at this conference we were attending. And it if weren't for the alcohol we probably we have not gotten friendly at all. lol.

Anyways, I was visiting with Mr. M this weekend and we had drinks/dinner arranged with an old friend of his and her husband. But not just any friend. This is THE friend from high school. You know, they were close in school and have managed to stay friends for about 15 years. I was a bit nervous. Even though I am not generally friendly I still want people to like me! So I pumped myself to have a good time and makes sure I made a good impression. We met up at this place called Cumin which is an Indian fusion restaurant and tres chic:

I think I looked cute enough but not like I tried too hard. Mr. M was looking good with his charcoal button down and blazer. His friends look super stylish but approachable. Turns out we got along perfectly. They enjoyed my humor and we had a blast talking about everything and anything. The martini I had prior to dinner was amazing. The food and wine were out of this world. I did get up to use the ladies room at some point and I KNEW they were talking about me (turns out they were telling Mr. M that they loved me). Our next stop was BLU. It turned out to be this hip sushi restaurant that turns bar/nightclub and we were pretty lucky to score a table. I introduced my new friend to Flirtini's and proceeded to have a great time at this bar.

I knew I had done my job in making sure the friend liked me when we both decided to go to the restroom. I asked if it was a one stall or two stall. She said one but we were friends so we could share. The men looked at each other in amazement and proceeded to talk about how men would NEVER do that. We trotted along to the bathroom together like girls do.

The night ended with two drunks (the girls) hugging and talking about meeting up again soon. I think I have to pat myself on the back here. :)

A few things I learned about girl flirting that evening:

1. Compliment an article of clothing or accessory

2. Laugh at her jokes

3. Bring alcohol into the mix (I had 4 martini's and half a bottle of wine - a bit overboard)

4. Ask questions fun questions (like what are you top 5 counties you want to visit)

5. When you things are going well, talking about a visit to the bathroom

Insomnia and Daylight Savings or Why I Am Eternally Tired

Screw daylight savings time.
Yes, the days are longer and I will probably enjoy that during the summer. Fine you got me there. BUT I feel like I am getting an hour less of sleep.

Maybe I am extra bitter because I already have a hard time going to sleep. For some reason, every night between 11-12 pm I revert to my six year old self. I have this awful internal fight about going to sleep. I am so exhausted yet I want to stay up. For what? Nothing good is on TV. Reading can be dangerous because at times I get so engrossed that I could read for an hour or two. Maybe I don't want to go to sleep because I don't want to miss out on anything. Or maybe sleep is most enjoyed only in the wee hours of the morning.

It could be time itself. Come to think of it I may be slightly obsessed with it. Time is everywhere. On my computer, my watch, my phone etc. I am one of those strange people that NEVER takes their watch off. Not to shower, swim, cook or workout. I literally get anxiety when I don't have it on (that is why I alone will probably keep Swiss Army in business). I am constantly checking my phone not to see if I received an email or a text but to check up on the time. Just making sure its still there. I wake up in the middle of the night and I must know what time it is. AND I then must calculate how many hours of sleep I have left (to the minute).

Did I tell you I won the genetic jackpot? *rolling my eyes*
I should blame my family and their stupid insomniac and obsessive genes. See, insomnia runs in my family. So does being obsessed with time. People in my family also tend to be obsessive about things but not compulsive. Oh joy. lol. So I am rarely compulsive about things but I can be obsessive. Guess what Time? You are the lucky winner!
Stupid genetic mutations...

It would all be worth it, lack of sleep and cost of under eye makeup, if I actually did something productive with my time when I can't sleep. Instead I get caught up watching re-runs of sex in the city on TBS (which takes all the good parts out). Or I read blogs. Check facebook. Organize my jewelry. Write letters I will never mail. Any extremely unproductive activity can take place when I should be sleeping.

I may need to find a lullaby. THE lullaby. Or pursue hypnosis. Either way I need more sleep and I am damn bitter about giving up an hour for daylight savings.

I got some vitamin D

It was a glorious weekend in the South. The sun was shinning and there was a light breeze. Everyone was out an about walking their dog, going to the park, etc. I managed to get brunch with some friends, take a nap, go to the park, have some tea at Caribou and have a beers on Ken's porch. And it was a Harry Potter weekend on TBS. Enough said.

While at Caribou, I spotted my next car parked by the front door. Check it out:I found this quite funny.

The weekend was so perfect I wish I could bottle it up for the next cold/rainy day. Apparently we have another bout of crappy weather this weekend. Stupid weather...And I will be in Ohio the following weekend so I should enjoy it while I have it.

We will have 70 degree weather until Wednesday though. My skirts and dresses are back in business, even if it's just for a few days. Oh, and hello open toed shoes. I missed you. Come to mama!

Come on summer! Just be here already. My summer wardrobe and I need each other!

3 cups of coffee and 1 Fresca later...

3 cups of coffee and 1 Fresca later I am still not ready to take a test tonight. Even though it is the last test I will be taking for a very long time....

Reason why I want to protest this exam:

1. This is grad school - tests are for students 21 and under

2. True/False, multiple choice and short answer questions give me nasty flashbacks to middle school.

3. Visiting professors should be gently reminded that grad students expect research papers to be a better assessment of their knowledge.

4. It is ridiculous to expect me to take a test and then stay for a lecture.

5. I don't even really know what is going to be on the exam, thanks for being vague.

6. Going through a 45 slide PowerPoint and NOT giving us access to a copy does not give a professor the right to test me on it (seeing as I do not have photographic memory).

7. This will drive me to drink on a week night.

8. My GPA may be affected negatively.

9. It has given me insomnia.

10. I am perilously close to not caring.

Glad I have beer at home. I will be having one around 9 pm.

Wish me luck!

I want my $38 back Ticketmaster!

Unless you live under a rock, everyone must have heard that the South got slammed with a freak snow storm Sunday night. It is March right? WTH?

Generally I enjoy snow days because it usually means the entire city shuts down and I don't have to go to work. The snow began on Sunday night when I was getting ready for the Ben Folds Concert. FYI: I heart Ben Folds and I have never seen him in concert. My friend Megan was on her way to pick me up when the snow started. The snow was so bad that cars were sliding and all all the news stations were telling people to stay home. We tried to call the venue and Ticketmaster to see if they were going to cancel the show since people couldn't get there. We never got anyone on the phone and they had no update on their website. It was entirely too snowy and icy on the roads to go.

Since I was going to stay home, I put on some pj's and settled in to watch some TV. 30 minutes later the power went out. After finding the one scented candle in the entire apartment, I tried to stay in my room and keep warm (after the blackout I realized I am not at all prepared for an emergency and I MUST go get some candles and a flashlight). I was going to try and brave out the cold but I lucked out and my friend Dre and her boyfriend picked me up. I got to spend the night in a warm house and my work called a snow day for Monday.

Monday morning we find out that they decide to still go on with the show. Are you serious?! The venue basically told us we lost the money since the show went on and we didn't show up. Ticketmaster said they make look into it by figuring out how many tickets were sold vs. how many people actually showed up. I hope we get some type of credit or refund. I mean, I love Ben Folds. But not enough to risk my life. So Ticketmaster, you owe me $38!!!